SECRETS LANZAROTE RESORT

I absolutely love this hotel, staff are so friendly, they go out of their way to make you happy, and honestly dont fail. We have been so many times, we have done A/I, prefered, we decided to do half board this time as we are not big drinkers. So with the extra money we saved we booked the spa for the 10 days we are here 😁. If it is a quiet retreat you are looking for with fabulous views and a amazing port to sit and watch life go by I highly recommend this hotel it is expensive but worth it. I promise. Prefered is nice, you get to relax by the best pool which we miss 🙄 but again expensive but if you drink and eat alot do it. O and as for the works ppl mention honestly did not bother us at all, head phones, music what's the problem 😁. Also the work is almost finished The spa is fab too has sunbeds in and outside the pool is amazing obviously so is the rest of the area, As I say highly recommend secrets to anyone. Actually recommended it to one of my colleagues and they where so impressed by it. Thanks Secrets lanzarote x x

I chose this adults-only, all-inclusive resort expecting a level of quality consistent with the Hyatt brand and the broader Secrets portfolio. The hotel presents itself as a five-star luxury property, and when guests have questioned this in reviews on platforms like TripAdvisor, the hotel has responded by stating that it is classified as five-star under Spanish standards. That may be the case officially, but in reality, it does not meet international five-star expectations. This view comes from extensive personal experience across many Secrets properties and numerous Hyatt hotels worldwide. There is a broader issue here. It makes no sense to market a hotel as “luxury five-star” in an international context if the experience is based only on local classification standards. A global brand creates global expectations. If the product does not meet those expectations, the positioning becomes misleading. Calling something luxury does not make it so. In this review, I will outline what that gap looks like in practice. Arrival and check-in The arrival experience felt disorganized and lacked attention to detail. Check-in took around 15 minutes and included going through maps and general explanations. Drinks were offered, but incorrectly. Assistance to the room was offered, but the staff member did not accompany us beyond a couple of steps from reception. We waited around 30 minutes for our luggage to arrive, which in retrospect we should have handled ourselves. The initial room assignment was also incorrect: we had requested twin beds but were given a double. This was corrected quickly, but the first impression had already taken a hit. The reception appeared to be staffed largely by trainees, which may explain the uneven service. Room condition and maintenance The biggest issue is the condition of the rooms and the overall level of upkeep. While there has clearly been a renovation at some point in the past decade, the property is already showing clear signs of wear and is now in need of a proper refurbishment. Scratched walls and wallpaper visibly peeling off. Bathroom tiles and silicone seams in need of thorough deep cleaning. Both sinks not draining at all. Paintwork done carelessly, with tiles, trims, and doors painted over without precision. Large palm-sized flakes of white wall paint falling onto the balcony floor. Sticky surfaces and visible fingerprints on doors and cabinetry. Air conditioning underpowered and not effectively removing humidity. These are not small cosmetic issues. In an internationally positioned five-star hotel, these basics should be in order. Peeling wallpaper alone is enough to question the entire luxury classification. Noise problems Noise control is a major problem. Housekeeping activity was constantly intrusive, with carts, conversations, clattering glassware and bottles, and general movement clearly audible inside the room. Corridor noise carried directly into the space, and cleaning of neighboring rooms was particularly disruptive, including repeated impacts against walls and loud dragging of furniture. The overall sound environment resembled a service corridor or a commercial kitchen rather than a hotel room designed for rest. Daytime relaxation was practically impossible. There was a clear lack of awareness and discretion from housekeeping staff. Normally, hotels are designed and renovated in a way that prevents corridor noise from entering the room. Here, that basic expectation was not met. Noise issues were not limited to housekeeping. Late in the evenings, even after 11pm, music continued playing in the outdoor areas and was clearly audible on all balconies. At that time of night, guests should be able to choose whether they want to listen to music in their room or not. This removed that choice entirely. More broadly, the music selection throughout the stay raised questions. The same playlist was played repeatedly during breakfast, lunch, dinner, and throughout the day. It consisted mainly of slow, drawn-out versions of well-known songs: multiple versions of “Hallelujah,” and familiar artists like Taylor Swift turned into long, coffee shop-style acoustic covers. This creates a strange effect. Instead of enhancing the atmosphere, it feels repetitive and disconnected from the location. In a destination like Lanzarote, in a hotel positioning itself as a luxury resort, one would expect at least some local or traditional Spanish music to reflect the surroundings. Instead, the same generic background playlist follows you from morning to night: the kind of music people already hear daily at work, on the radio, or in cafés. It also raises a question of tone and awareness. Repeating emotionally heavy songs like “Hallelujah” throughout the day, in the current global climate, feels oddly out of place in what is meant to be a relaxing holiday environment. In a setting like this, you would expect something more considered and appropriate to the atmosphere. Public areas and acoustics The shared spaces look acceptable but are acoustically very problematic. The lobby and the World Café buffet restaurant suffer from heavy echo and poor sound absorption. Evening entertainment was played at extremely high volume levels, far beyond comfortable listening, and the architecture of the space amplified the problem. The added reverb effects only made things worse. During one Bollywood-themed evening, the bass was so loud it could be heard and felt even in the room, which was located as far from the lobby as possible. The performance space could have been placed elsewhere, or at the very least treated acoustically with curtains or other elements to reduce echo. Seating was arranged in tight rows, almost like a church setting, filling the entire floor. People clearly wanted to move and dance, but instead were expected to sit rigidly in rows. Even breakfast became uncomfortable due to constant high noise levels and echo. Parts of the restaurant are very tall open spaces where everyone ends up raising their voice because normal conversation is impossible. The scale of the space without proper acoustic treatment makes the environment exhausting. Food Experience Breakfast was solid and covered all expected basics. Lunch and dinner at the World Café buffet varied in quality, but it was always possible to find something acceptable. The Italian à la carte restaurant was underwhelming, offering very average food with little distinction. The space suffered from the same acoustic issues, to the point where some guests were using noise-cancelling headphones while dining. The Oceana restaurant by the sea was a clear positive. The food was good, service was excellent, and everything ran efficiently. One consistent highlight was the restaurant staff overall. Service in the dining venues was professional, attentive, and genuinely helpful. This was one of the few areas where the hotel met expectations. Facilities & Exterior Maintenance The resort offers multiple pools and a visually appealing layout, but maintenance issues are visible throughout. The main pool has chipped plaster on the bottom, which looks very worn. Wooden railings and exterior wooden elements on balconies and in public areas are deteriorating with peeling paint. This is understandable due to weather conditions, but it should be maintained regularly or replaced with more durable materials Exterior walls have been patched in a way that leaves visible differences between old and new surfaces. Lighting across the property lacks uniformity, with burnt-out bulbs, mismatched tones, and even a flickering multicolor light in the pool area at night. Balcony lighting varies significantly in both brightness and color tone between rooms. All of these details weaken the overall impression and highlight the lack of proper upkeep. Service Gaps The Guest Experience desk was consistently unattended during the day. The only time staff were present was during evening hours when the lobby area was extremely loud, making it practically impossible to have a proper conversation or resolve issues. Additional Observations There is no on-site shop for essentials such as water, snacks, or toiletries, even though there is clear space and demand. Other guests also mentioned that this is something the hotel is missing and would benefit from. The nearest village is about a 15-minute walk in each direction, with some hills, which may not suit everyone. Taxis, however, are very affordable, typically ranging from 10 to 30 euros depending on the destination. There were no children or party crowds, which was a positive. Beds were acceptable, though not at a level that stands out in this category. Final Assessment While Secrets Lanzarote Resort & Spa promotes an adults-only, high-end experience with extensive inclusions, the reality falls short of what can reasonably be described as international luxury. The most significant issue is the condition of the rooms and the general level of maintenance. The property already feels worn and clearly needs refurbishment. Combined with serious noise issues and uneven service, the overall experience does not meet five-star expectations on a global level. There is potential here in terms of concept and location, but in its current state, the hotel is not being maintained or operated at the level its branding suggests.

Stayed for a week and from start to finish the staff can't do enough to assist you in any way possible, special thanks to Veronica on the front desk who took my broken glasses away and got them mended. The location and views are perfect so quiet and peaceful, there's a coastal path to the local marina where there are shops and restaurants. Again a beautiful place to stay

We have been visiting this hotel for over 25 years. The staff are excellent and the hotel is well located just a pleasant walk to the marina. We think the Puerto Calero is one of the best locations on the island

4th time here - going backwards unfortunately. Pool bar (hub) under renovation which happens, yet hotel did little/nothing to absorb impact or manage situation for guests Poor for a five star spa hotel IMO